Friday, August 22, 2008

Paper cuts, Memes, and Missing Toilet Paper

So, like I said in the last post, the stupid is really winning the battle around the office this week, thanks in large part to that gigantic mail out I mentioned. Apparently receiving a certified letter from a company you routinely do business with creates confusion on a near heart attack inducing level.

Things I have actually said over the phone to customers regarding this letter:

“No really, EVERYONE got one.”

“No, it isn’t an overdue bill.”

“No, it does not mean you are being sued.”

“No, it does not mean WE are being sued.”

“Did you actually read the letter?”

Mass hysteria the likes of which I’ve never seen and I was at the release party for Breaking Dawn people!

Now, here’s the frustrating part of this situation…as a blogger I want to talk about it to you, my readers, but I don’t want to give away too much about the industry in which I am currently working. I also don’t want to get to whiny or rant-y because I know you hate it as much as I do. *coughcouchhinthintRobertcough*

And let’s face it, for the most part:

So let’s see if I can effectively sum up this situation in under oh….50 words.

We sent a computer generated form letter via certified mail to ALL our customers explaining that if they perform a specific modification to any items they purchase from us which are still under their original factory warranty they will immediately void the warranty for that item.

Forty six words. I win.

The letter is concise and uncomplicated. Hell, they didn’t even use any ‘legal lingo’ in the thing! And yet the phone calls keep coming!!!

In other un-work-related news my bathroom renovation is still not complete. (My God! Could my life be more riveting than it is at this moment? I think not!) The job, which was supposed to take ‘two days at most,’ has now stretched itself out to over two weeks. Way to procrastinate, Apartment Complex Maintenance Guy!

And speaking of you, ACMGuy, what’s the deal with Bogarting an entire roll of my toilet paper? Huh? What is that about???

What else can I tell you about that is completely unrelated and totally off topic?

Oh! I was inter-office meme-d today. Here, I’ll throw it in for your reading pleasure…

Two names you go by:
1. HistoryDiva
2. SuperTemp

Two of your favorite things to do:
1. Procrastinate
2. Deliberately procrastinate

Two things you want very badly at the moment:
1. Better blog fodder
2. A pay raise…which might happen if I would stop blogging at work!

Two Pets that you have or have had:
1. Several suicidal goldfish, all of whom succeeded
2. Thing One and Thing Two…who aren’t actually mine

Two things you did last night:
1. Now, now, inter-office meme, that’s a little personal don’t you think?
2.

Last thing you ate:
1. Lunch…and hey, what happened to the whole ‘two things’ theme?

Two people you last talked to:
1. An automated message for someone who doesn’t actually work here
2. A debt collector looking for an employee

Two things you're doing tomorrow:
1. Ignoring roommate’s cats when they attempt to rouse me from sleep at 5:00 am
2. yeah….that’s pretty much the only goal for tomorrow…

There were more questions on it but they were even more boring than these so I deleted them. Feel special. See how much I value you? I delete crap on your behalf cause I’m awesome like that.

And that, my lovelies, is that!

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